I have fought with something for as long as I can remember, this thing has followed me to some of my most happiest moments and was able to ruin them. It plagued me so badly I began to believe the thoughts it was placing. This emotiom usually starts small and ends enormously. I have to assume, I couldn’t be the only one who suffers with this haunting. Shame. 

This emotion started at a pretty young age for me. As far back as my first memories. Grade school seemed to be the place in my life where this one particular emotion hit me hardest. It may have happened the same for many others, but I’m speaking on what I know best, (as usual) me. I had a friend I grew up with, who at the time I felt would be my friend for life. This person was the closest to me, we did everything together. In grade school (around the time people start with puberty and hormones are raging) this very dear friend decided I wasn’t quiet the route they had planned anymore. Shame. It hit me hardest. 

My parents tried all they could to give the best they knew how, except it was never found in monetary items. My childhood was filled with outdoor activities, camping, hunting, riding through mud in an old ragged jeep (I can still smell that old fuel), excitement of spending time with my Dad (always a Daddy’s gal), and adventures. It was never focused on name brand clothes, brand new cars, the latest gadgets, or fancy parties. Believe me, I’m not knocking that lifestyle (heck I dreamed of it as a little girl). I love my childhood, it made me the awesome person I am today. It also made me feel shame. 

I never felt “cool/good” enough to hang with the people I thought would be amazing friends. Actually, at one point I became a cheerleader simply because I got tired of feeling shame. At that young of an age I felt it so deeply. I knew it wasn’t right to feel that way (growing up in church), but you honestly can’t prpeare yourself for everything. 

All of the back story to show its something I’ve honestly struggled with. So many other things (I will save for other blogs) have made shame creep up in my life as well. 

The feeling of shame almost feels impossible to pass. As cliché as it sounds, Christ is literally the only thing I’ve found to soothe the hurt shame brings. The feeling of, I’m not good enough has a funny way of fleeing at the name of Jesus! 😉 I’ve learned through my years, to understand when I am beginning to feel shame. I have come close to mastering how to stop it in it’s tracks. 

That’s my suggestion to you as well. Know your body, know your emotions, know your ruts, know you ARE good enough through Christ, know Christ is in you therefore shame has no place! It takes knowing, then trusting! Once you’ve declared your victory trust the victor to take it! Release it into His hands, and allow Him to work in you. After that’s done, be sure to give thanks and praise. Then, it’s finished. If it rares itself again repeat, repeat, repeat! 

PRAYER:

If there is one person out there feeling shame, it’s one too many. Allow your peace to flow through this pain and show us your mighty-ness. If we are unable to feel you working through it and need another boost of encouragement please send someone our way to do just that. If anyone reading happens to be the person sent to encourage, give them the words to say. In Jesus name. -AMEN.